SADness

Yes, I'm alive.

No, I haven't been fishing...except for a few hours chucking fowl-sized flies for muskie. And no, I didn't hook (or see) any.

The vise was hauled out a few nights back, tying a few mid-sized ugly flies to refill the bass box for next season. But even that burst of spontaneous creativity was short-lived due to traveling for work.

It's -12°C here in Idaho (about 10°F in Yankee units), with snow on the way. I didn't bother to bring any fishing gear this trip for my post-work / pre-flight pilgrimage to the Boise River. Time constraints and such.

If you can't tell, I'm about three weeks deep into the winter blues and we're not even past the midway point of November.

I'm hoping for Sage to release a high-priced, angler-themed ultraviolet light to combat Seasonal Affective Disorder. I'll be one of the first to buy.

Only 154 days to go...

Note: my SADness is self-diagnosed and caused almost exclusively by lack of fishing. And probably not real. I'm sorry if people who truly suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder are offended at what they may perceive as insensitive humour. It's not my intention to offend, only to entertain...and whine...

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One thing that isn't 154 days away that I'm looking forward to is going to the International Fly Tying Symposium!

I'm going to help spread the word about Clear Cure Goo and its overall awesomeness, so if you're at the show this coming weekend, stop by the CCG booth to say hi to Brian and I...and buy some Clear Cure Goo!

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One of the mid-sized uglies I tied up the other night came out pretty good, if I do say so myself:

It's pretty simple, can be done in any number of colours, and only has seven ingredients including hook & thread:

• Hook: TMC 8089 #10
• Thread: black 6/0
• Tail: rabbit strip w/ Krystal flash above (long) & below (short)
• Body: Cactus chenille (black & copper shown above)
• Eyes: Medium dumbbell eyes
• Silli-legs

I used some Clear Cure Goo on the eyes & to finish the head, but any head cement could do the trick.

In the bass bug pictured, I used three legs per side (resulting in six legs/side), which, in the end, is a little excessive & a bit of a pain in the arsehole to deal with when wrapping the chenille. I'll only use two legs per side (four legs a-danglin') in the future.

This was the first fly in my new Bass Fly Philosopher's Collection, in which there are two components:

1. Surface flies: Sexy is good. Flashy is good. Precision is good. Think of deer hair bass bugs, hand-crafted foam & balsa poppers, so on, so forth. Care & effort is worth it.
2. Sub-surface flies: quick & dirty ties. Clousers, buggers and their variants that can be tied quickly, cheaply, and thus lost on bottom or structure without too much grief for time and dollars spent.

Most of my bass fishing is in a smallish river; hence, the majority of bass flies I use (and lose) are weighted flies I dead-drift along bottom or toss into structure. Because I'm one of only a handful of bass-on-the-fly guys in the area, the fish aren't all that heavily pressured by seeing a lot of flies. I don't need to antagonize over near-perfect appearance of crawfish claws to get some fish to eat.

For subsurface, simple is better. And cheaper.

The Ancient Greeks said it best, lamda phi balla ding dong: Keep it simple, shithead!

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A couple of notes about the TMC (aka Tiemco) 8089 bass bug hooks:

They are awesome. Big, wide gap & a good, stiff shank (that sounds dirty, huh?).

They're sharp as f**k (if you need a translation for that, here's a handy guide on understanding my people). I wasn't paying attention while palmering some rabbit hair, and, well, it really fuckin' hurt.

They are really big. Like, big. Don't think a TMC 8089 #10 is equivalent in size to some Mustad streamer #10. Because they are not. Not at all. I even did a little graphic for y'all on how goddamned huge these TMC 8089s are:

Yes, that's your standard Mustad 34007 saltwater hook. Like redfish, baby tarpon, snook-sized fly hook. The TMC 8089 #10 is almost the exact same size, albeit with a thinner gauge wire. The Tiemco engineers must've been huffing a little too much glue when labelling the 8089 series...

But still an awesome hook.

Confession of a Southern Wannabe

Time/Date: 2035, 30-Jan-12
Location: not the South

Today was a good day for receiving the mail, even though the repeated banging on the door caused Awesome the Dog a few freakouts.

All in the same day, I received my FFF membership package, the new Orvis catalogue (even though I requested not to be sent it; I work in an authorized Orvis fly shop), the new TFM redfish hoodie, and a cap from Southern Culture on the Fly.

My Southern apparel collection grew a bit today...

Some might ask, "Why would you get a redfish hoodie & a hat from some southern fly fishing e-mag? You're from Atlantic Canada."

An easy, and partly true, response would be, "I respect what they do & wish to support them."

But really, the whole truth is...I (not-so) secretly want to be a Southerner.

That's right.

I'm a southern wannabe.

This goes beyond my affinity for hot sauce & chicken wings, people, so why don't y'all just grab yourselves a tasty mint julep and set yourselves down & hear me out?

My main issue is this little tidbit right here.

It's called weather.

Here's the weather here at home for the next few days (note: I converted from Celsius for y'all):

Fredericton, NB

And now a few selected locales in my wannabe-adopted homeland:

Charleston, SC

New Orleans, LA

Islamorada, FL

What you don't see in the extended forecast for Fredericton is a stick-figure with a noose around his neck on Wednesday.

Then there's the whole fishing thing.

I'm not necessarily shitting on the fishing scene here in NB. I mean, it's alright. But the season opens April 15th (May 1st on lakes/ponds), and closes Oct.15th...or Nov. 30th on tidal water, if you're brave enough to handle it.

And if you break it down into some sort of spreadsheet-thingy (Table 1A), the scales tip a little more to fishing in the South.

Table 1A: Ummm, yeah...it isn't that bad here...

And it's not like I haven't been there before; heck, I even brought some reds to hand before some of your own have (you know who you are...):

It was only 3 days, and it left a serious impression on me.

I've been calling myself a semi-retired country gentleman for almost two years now...how much more epic would it be if I could replace 'country gentleman' with 'Southern gentleman?' That's almost worth the price of admission right there.

Other random positives about the south:

• Open liquor laws: here in NB, get caught with open booze, it's a fine of over $85. From what I saw in NOLA, the police officers cheers you.
• It appears the Antiques Roadshow comes through regularly. This would make my lovely girlfriend quite happy.
• Going to see if Hazzard County really exists sounds far more appealing than visiting the Shivering Songs Festival (no offence to Shivering Songs, but 'shivering' doesn't sell me).
• Barbecue is a way of life & state of mind. Here, barbecue ranges from common novelty (summer) to ordeal (winter).
• My blossoming bass bug skills would be appreciated more there than here.
• Running from a hurricane sounds more fun than sitting through a blizzard.
• I could use being there as an excuse to listen to Willie Nelson more often.

So, my southern readers, I'd be properly honoured if y'all would consider harbouring a northern illegal alien...and his lovely girlfriend...and his adorable dog...and quite possibly a few other northern refugees that might pass through next winter....

This northerner wants to wage a war of aggression...against being cold, bored & fishless all winter...

And I even have the southern rock thing down...sort of...  Enjoy the track:

PS - Mom, Dad, I'm not really moving to the south. At least, not yet...

Beginner Bass Bugs...

Time/Date: 2235 AST, 16-Jan-12
Location: My tying bench

I decided to plunk my ass at my tying bench to give myself a crash course in spinning deer hair for bass bugs...and try out my new Peak Rotary Vise in the process.

My lovely gf gave me a gift card to the bookstore for Christmas so I ordered up Bass Bug Basics by John M. Likakis to help speed the self-taught crash course up a little bit. If you're interested in tying bass bugs, it's definitely a handy resource to have on hand.

For my first tie, I decided on trying my hand at Tap's Bug, which was declared the "best bass bug ever" in the Nov/Dec 2008 issue of Fly Rod & Reel magazine. You see step-by-step pics & instructions to tie the bug on Fy Rod & Reel Online here.

This is what the finished bug is supposed to look like (from the Fly Rod & Reel article):

And, after a few thread-snaps, a lot of trimming and minor cursing, this is what I ended up with:

I'm usually pretty critical of my tying...but realize bass aren't typically as critical & selective; if they're eating, they'll eat that. So I'm ok with this first effort. I'm not going to fish it; instead, I'm keeping it as a benchmark to measure up future bass bugs to. And yes, there will be many future bass bugs.

A few things to point out if you're going to start tying deer hair bass bugs:

• make sure your tying scissors are sharp;
• pick up some old-timey, flexible razor blades for trimming the deer hair. I found a package of Wilkinson Sword Classics at Shoppers Drug Mart. Ten double-sided blades = 20 razor blades for sculpting bass bugs; just snip 'em in half with a Leatherman or similar;
• get a strong thread. I'm using UNI BigFly thread...and snapped it a few times while tying my first bug
• be patient! I ended up cutting off my second bug of the night to start over due to trying to rush. Take your time & follow the steps;
• be prepared to make a mess. I don't think I have ever done a recreational activity that makes a mess like this. If you're married, do NOT do this at the dining room table if your better half is within a three hours' drive radius of your home. Bass bugs are that perfect excuse to set up a personal tying area, far from any potential marital disputes.
• In addition to the razor blades, other items that are handy to have are: rounded-tip tweezers (for pushing thread/knots along the hook shank) and a fine-toothed comb (for cleaning underfur from deer hair).
• If you want to put on those rattling, googly doll eyes, you can pick up packages of 300 for cheap at craft shops. A drop of ZapAGap or similar cyanoacrylate adhesive will keep them on the bug through most battles with bronzebacks...or bucketmouths...

Once I improve spinning/packing/sculpting these bad boys, I'll post a few more.

Enjoy some music: